It occurred to me the other day, that my attitude toward querying and sending out my writing work has changed dramatically in the past few years.
It used to be that I expected every query or contest entry to be the one. My work is fantastic and everyone will want it. It never occurred to me that people wouldn't see it that way. So I got a lot of rejections and boy did it hurt.
Now when I send a query or a requested manuscript, or enter a contest, I expect rejection. I don't have that spark of hope any more. I still love my stories, and I still want them out in the world, but after almost four years of querying and hustling to get my babies out there, I've become hard-wired to expect rejection. And it doesn't hurt so much any more.
I don't think this is a very healthy attitude to have, but I'm not sure how to get that spark back. I feel like the publishing journey has ground me down. I still love writing, but the whole trying to get published thing is really hard and soul destroying.
Do you feel this way too? Are you pre-programmed for rejection?
I see this a lot in writers online who've been grinding away for a while and it makes me sad. I think it's easy to forget that realistic expectations (I will probably receive more rejections than requests) are completely different from hope (I hope everyone I query loves this). Even though I know that not everyone is going to like my work, it can't stop me from hoping they do.
ReplyDeleteI disagree. I've come to expect rejection too. Now when they come, I just roll y my eyes and keep going. But lots of times, I open a rejection letter only to find a request or request for revisions. And that's a good feeling. I'm presently surprised never burnt. I like this attitude.
ReplyDeleteAfter three years and over 100 rejections, I still expect every reply to a query to be a request -- I know. Silly, right? -- and I expect that once I send my wonderful ms to agents, they'll be fighting over who gets to represent me. It's good I write fiction because I obviously have an overactive imagination! :-D
ReplyDeleteI wish I still had that optimism... But whenever I get a request, it makes me outrageously happy. Even though I know it'll end in rejection too.
DeleteI'm pretty down right now, but usually I look on the bright side. So I get a rejection. That just wasn't the right agent/publisher. Keep trying. Don't stop until you're no longer breathing. :)
ReplyDeleteAbsolutely. I was completely that way- very disbelieving that even a request would turn into anything. And we know how that story ended.
ReplyDeleteYour stories are amazing. Keep working and writing. I, at least, love your words.